Torah.org Home Subscribe Services Support Us
 

Karen's Story

It gives me mixed emotions to write this story.

In a recent Dvar Torah (Lifeline, Vayishlach), Rabbi Yaakov Menken described a father talking of his daughter's predicament in a marriage. I thought he was writing about me, because, lo and behold, the exact same thing happened to me. Except, in my case my ex-husband threatened to teach Christian beliefs to my son if I ever left him. During the marriage, after his religious revolution, he erred on being not too dominating with his new religion.

It is very important to understand that the only reason I agreed to marry my ex-husband was that he promised, before we got married, that he would allow me to raise our children as Jews (in all meanings of the word). He agreed.

Well, fast forward to the custody battle. Religion became an issue. He participated in the circumcision of my son and understood the religion. These facts are very important, because the judge in my court case ruled based on these facts (and especially on the verbal promise) that my son's father was not to take him to any of his religious activities, to a church, prayer group, teach his religion, etc. He also is to serve no pork or shellfish to my son (and when my son is older, no meat and milk). I wasn't able to enforce the kosher meat or house rule. At least, he is not to say anything bad about Judaism to my son, but is to support my son's Judaism by not insulting it and allowing my son to practice it. He can only explain to my son his religious beliefs but not enforce them upon my son. This is an extremely favorable ruling, which others may need to know about.

However, I have learned my lesson. Judaism is my priority (I must not have had it high on the list, since I married a non-Jew -- I realize that now). Now that I am meeting people again, I will only meet Jewish men, all others are out of the picture completely. I feel I have saved my son's life. He goes to the JCC and we attend children's Shabbat services. And we are Jews inside and out. I always have been my whole life. To me it is who I am, what I do, how I think. I am so proud to be Jewish.

I thank you for reading this note. I got a lot out of Rabbi Menken's message and totally agree that we must marry within our culture and religion, Judaism. I hope you do too.

Thank you, Rabbi Menken, for your words, and Good Luck with touching others out there on the web!


 






ARTICLES ON DEVARIM AND THE THREE WEEKS:

View Complete List

Small Allusions
Rabbi Chaim Flom - 5767

The Speech That Never Ends
Rabbi Berel Wein - 5764

Children Are A Gift
Rabbi Yissocher Frand - 5765

Frumster - Orthodox Jewish Dating

Children are a Gift
Rabbi Yissocher Frand - 5762

Fear Itself
Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky - 5758

The Darkest Corner
Rabbi Label Lam - 5763

ArtScroll

Rebuilding the Temple
Rabbi Pinchas Winston - 5768

Personal Judge
Rabbi Yaakov Menken - 5762

A Meaningful Approach
Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky - 5757

> A Clash of Titans
Rabbi Aron Tendler - 5763

A Gift to Claim
Rabbi Yaakov Menken - 5756

No Child's Game
Rabbi Dovid Green - 5760

Looking for a Chavrusah?

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
Rabbi Yochanan Zweig - 5771

In Other Words
Shlomo Katz - 5764

Body Language
Rabbi Yochanan Zweig - 5770

Soft Sell
Rabbi Raymond Beyda - 5763



Project Genesis

Torah.org Home


Torah Portion

Jewish Law

Ethics

Texts

Learn the Basics

Seasons

Features

TORAHAUDIO

Ask The Rabbi

Knowledge Base




Help

About Us

Contact Us



Free Book on Geulah!




Torah.org Home
Torah.org HomeCapalon.com Copyright Information