Last week we began discussing the situations in which it is permissible to
speak lashon hara. However, there are no less than seven conditions that
must be fulfilled before we can do so.
1.We cannot make any critical statement about a person on the basis of
information obtained through hearsay. Only through first-hand information
may one assume that someone’s character or behavior is wanting2 . Even if we have personally witnessed
seemingly unacceptable behavior we must not hastily pass judgment.
Circumstances must be carefully investigated before we can be sure that we
understand a situation correctly3 .
2.Before we relate negative information we must carefully consider whether
or not our words will in fact bring about the desired result. . For
example, we may seek to discourage a a potentially harmful business
association but often a final decision has already been make and speaking
negatively of the other party will serve no constructive purpose.
3.Before speaking about a person with others, we must, if at all feasible,
first discuss the issue with that person himself. For example, if someone
is acting in an anti-social way, speaking to the person himself may be
effective, precluding the need to speak to others about him. This
condition does not apply if speaking to the sinner might make it more
difficult to achieve the desired result through other means. An example
of this is if we suspect someone of certain dishonesty - speaking to him
may only succeed in causing him to be more careful not to get caught. In
such a situation, we should not speak to him first.
4.If in addition to personal reproof, any other option exists that could
preclude the necessity to speak negatively, it must be pursued.
5.Even if speaking negatively is necessary we should choose the least
blatant means by which to communicate that information. Directing someone
to where he will become aware of information on his own is preferable to
expressing it verbally.
6.While derogatory information may be related for a constructive purpose,
slander cannot be justified. In particular we must be very careful not to
exaggerate - this is included within the definition of slander.
7.Having fulfilled all the above conditions we must be certain that his
sole intent is for a constructive purpose. However, if we know that in
our heart we are pleased to cast the person in a bad light then we are not
permitted to speak - even though the purpose cannot be accomplished any
other way. It is necessary first to eradicate any negative feelings
towards that person and only then can the negative information be spoken.
Needless to say that we must be well-versed in the laws of lashon hara
before we permit ourselves to speak negatively even when we see a
constructive purpose. The Torah guides us as to what really does justify
speaking badly about others.
1 The information for this essay is taken from ‘Lesson a Day’,
p.134. 2 An exception to this rule is where we seek to protect
someone from potential harm - such instances would permit us to pass on
second-hand information. This will be discussed later. 3 Indeed, there is a separate commandment which requires us to
judge others favorably and not jump to negative conclusions about people’s