These divrei Torah were adapted from the hashkafa portion of Rabbi Yissocher Frand’s Commuter Chavrusah Series on the weekly portion: #1318 – Ectogenesis: Artificial Wombs – The Coming Era of Motherless Birth? Good Shabbos!

At the beginning of Parshas Vayigash, Yehuda recounts the events that have been transpiring throughout Parshas Miketz. Yehuda does not really say anything new in this review of his arguments to Yosef that would potentially convince Yosef to act differently than he has been acting until now. The only argument that seems to make an impression is when Yehuda says “If I go back up to Canaan and Binyomin will not be with me, then my father will die.”

Many times, as a manner of speaking, people say, “If such and such happens the person won’t be able to take it. He will have a heart attack and will die.” Such loose talk is highly speculative. Maybe yes; maybe no. But if Yehudah makes that statement and the Torah records it, then it is a reality. This is not some kind of an empty threat or a negotiating tactic.

In fact, this argument of Yehudah did carry the day with Yosef. Yosef did not want to be a party to the death of his father. The question is why and how Yehudah knew definitively that “it will be that when he sees the lad is not there then he will die.” (Bereshis 44:31)?

The Sfas Emes explains a principle about the Avos Hakedoshim (the holy Patriarchs) and the Shevatim (Twelve Tribes).

We all have families. We work for our families. We put effort into our families. We support them. We are driven to build them. These are our children. “I see this as my mission in life – to develop this family entity.”

The Sfas Emes says that in the case of the Avos, it was much more than just “building a family.” Each of them had a mission to “build Klal Yisrael.” Their lives were focused on creating a nation. Just like on a micro level, we are willing to work very hard and to put in long hours because “I need to do this for my family,” so too the Avos were doing this on a macro level. They were willing to do whatever it takes to build Klal Yisrael.

Out of all the Avos, Yaakov Avinu in particular had a very difficult life. He experienced trials and tribulations with his brother Eisav, with his uncle and father-in-law Lavan, with his daughter Dina, and with his son Yosef. He had a very difficult life. How was he able to survive? It was because he understood that what was happening to him was what the Ribono shel Olam wanted to happen to him, because somehow, in one way or another, this was purifying him and purifying, im yirtzeh Hashem, Klal Yisrael. Therefore, Yaakov was able to take and accept whatever came his way, confident that he could somehow get through it, as the price that needed to be paid to build Klal Yisrael.

The Sfas Emes points out that Yaakov used a rather uncommon form of the name of Hashem when he sent his sons back to Mitzraim: “Keil Shakai should grant you mercy before this man…” (Bereshis 43:14). Rashi explains the nuance of the use of Keil Shakai here: The One who said (during the process of creation) to My world dai (enough already) should now say dai (enough already) to my troubles.” The name of Hashem that is spelled Shin-Daled-Yud is an acronym for She’amar l’olamo dai. Yaakov told his sons, “I have had enough already. I can’t take it anymore!”

Yaakov is saying “I can’t take it anymore.” This is the Yaakov who we just said had the attitude “If I need to go through the troubles with Eisav, I’ll take it. If I need to go through the troubles with Lavan, I will take it, etc., etc. – all so that he could build a Klal Yisrael. What suddenly happened that here Yaakov says “I can’t take it anymore?”

Yaakov is not speaking in frustration, like we might say in frustration, “I can’t take it anymore! I can’t take this job! I can’t take this boss! I can’t take this aggravation!” No. That is not Yaakov Avinu. Yaakov knew he had a limit. He knew that he just would not be able to survive another tragedy of the magnitude of the loss of Binyomin. Yehudah knew this because that is what he heard from the mouth of Yaakov himself when he invoked the name Shin Daled Yud and proclaimed that Keil Sha-dai must say ‘Enough already’ to my troubles.”

The Sfas Emes says that with this understanding, we can answer a question that everyone asks: Yosef is number two in the Egyptian ruling hierarchy. He can do whatever he wants. Why didn’t he send a message to his father, Yaakov, informing him that he is still alive? Yosef was a compassionate son. He loved his father. Why didn’t he relieve his father’s intense suffering by sending him a courier and letting him know he was alive and well? The answer is that Yosef was also aware that Hashem deemed everything that Yaakov experienced appropriate for him to experience. This was somehow necessary for the creation of Klal Yisrael. Yaakov was the father of the Shevatim. Yaakov needed to experience everything that he experienced. Therefore, Yosef said to himself, “I am not going to intervene. I am not going to try to be smarter than the Ribono shel Olam. If the Ribono shel Olam wants to keep it hidden from Yaakov, that is His business.” Yosef was not going to second guess the plan of the Almighty because that would interfere with the mission of Yaakov Avinu.

Using this idea, the Sfas Emes explains something else that occurs at the end of the parsha. The pasuk says that when Yosef finally revealed himself to his brothers “…he fell on the shoulder of Binyomin his brother and he cried, and Binyomin cried on his shoulder.” (Bereshis 45:14) Rashi explains the reason for the crying. They were not merely tears of joy: “Yosef cried regarding the destruction of the two battei mikdash (temples) that would be built in the territory of the Tribe of Binyomin and would eventually be destroyed.”

Why do those particular historical events hit Yosef so hard specifically at this moment? The Sfas Emes explains an incredible thing. The pasuk says that when they met, Yosef could not take it anymore (v’lo yachol Yosef l’his-apek) and he broke down and started crying. The Sfas Emes says that from the fact that the pasuk says that Yosef could not do it anymore, we can infer that if Yosef could have held back longer, he would have. Were it not for the fact that he couldn’t control himself, he would have made his brothers go through more stress and anguish.

What does that mean? Was Yosef a sadist? Did he enjoy seeing his brothers suffer? The answer, says the Sfas Emes, is the same idea that we just mentioned: Just as Yaakov Avinu needed to endure his very difficult life for the Divinely planned creation of Klal Yisrael, so too, the Shevatim needed to endure this entire parsha of selling Yosef and then feeling guilty about it for all these years. The Shevatim saved us by going through all this suffering. They spared us from tzores (troubles) that could have befallen Klal Yisrael in later years.

Certainly, the Jewish people have suffered immeasurably for the last 3,000+ years, but it would have been much worse had the Shevatim not endured what they needed to endure. Yosef knew this, and he knew that all the suffering his brothers were enduring would eventually pay dividends and save Klal Yisrael from future tzores. Therefore, Yosef would in fact have continued this charade longer: Let them go through this suffering even more because it will pay off in the future. Eventually it will save us.

However, “Yosef could not hold back any longer.” He had no other choice but to end the charade right then. However, had he been able to hold out longer and prolong this national suffering at the moment of Klal Yisrael‘s creation, the Beis Hamikdash would never have been destroyed. The brothers suffering at that point in time was akin to the goat being pushed off the Azazel cliff on Yom Kippur. The brothers were akin to the Ten Martyrs executed by the Roman Government. Their suffering was an atonement for all of Klal Yisrael. Yosef knew the secret that “the death of the righteous atones for the masses of Klal Yisrael.” He was trying to accomplish that atonement through the prolonged suffering of his brothers, until he could continue no longer.

Imagine that! We would not have needed to experience the destruction of the two battei mikdash! Imagine if we had not needed to experience 2,000 years of exile! That all came about because “Yosef could not hold back any longer.” That, says the Sfas Emes, is why Yosef cried on the shoulder of Binyomin, crying about the destruction of the battei mikdash.

Transcribed by David Twersky; Jerusalem [email protected]

Technical Assistance by Dovid Hoffman; Baltimore, MD [email protected]

This week’s write-up is adapted from the hashkafa portion of Rabbi Yissochar Frand’s Commuter Chavrusah Series on the weekly Torah portion. A listing of the halachic portions for Parshas Vayigash is provided below:

• # 036 – Taxing the Community
• # 078 – The Uses of Snow in Halacha
• # 127 – Baby Naming
• # 174 – Twins
• # 220 – Host Mothers in Halacha
• # 264 – The Bracha for Kings and Presidents
• # 310 – Honoring Elderly Parents
• # 354 – Honoring Grandparents
• # 398 – K’rias Shma: How Early, Interruptions, Misc.
• # 442 – The Umbrella on Shabbos
• # 486 – Grandchildren in Halacha
• # 530 – Performing a Mitzvah Personally
• # 574 – Being the Bearer of Bad Tidings
• # 618 – K’rias Shema: Fascinating Insights
• # 662 – Learning and Davening on the Road
• # 706 – Z’man K’rias Shema
• # 750 – Will I Make Z’man K’rias Shema?
• # 794 – Must I Always Stand For the Rov
• # 838 – Answering Kedusah in the Middle of K’rias Shema
• # 882 – Father or Grandfather – Whom Do You Honor?
• # 926 – It’s The Thought That Counts
• # 969 – Burial In Eretz Yisroel II — How Important Is It?
• #1013 – My Chumrah vs Your Hurt Feelings
• #1057 – Lashon Kodesh: The Uniqueness of the Hebrew Language
• #1100 – K’rias Shema: What Is The Proper Kavanah?
• #1143 – Oops! I Forgot today is a Fast Day after I Mad a Bracha on Food
• #1186 – Facts About K’rias Shema You May Not Know
• #1230 – Waking Up Early To Eat Before a Taanis
• #1274 – Honoring Grandparents Revisited
• #1318 – Ectogenesis: Artificial Wombs – The Coming Era of Motherless Birth?
• #1362 – Flying East to West-West to East on a Fast Day-When Can You Break Your Fast
• #1406 – Being an Araiv – Guarantor – Know Your Rights and Responsibilities
• #1450 – I Came to Shul Late and They Are Saying Krias Shema – What Should I Do?
• #1494 – Should You or Should You Not Take the Corona Vaccine?
• #1538 – K’rias Shema: What Should or Should You Not Be Thinking?
• (2022) – She’Hechiyanu on Seeing a Long Lost Friend

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