And it will be, when you come into the land which HASHEM, your G-d, gives you for an inheritance, and you possess it and settle in it, that you shall take of the first of all the fruit of the ground, which you will bring from your land, which HASHEM, your G-d, is giving you. And you shall put [them] into a basket and go to the place which HASHEM, your G-d, will choose to have His Name dwell there…(Devarim 26:1-3)
Feelings of deep appreciation are at the center of our relationship with HASHEM. It drives us to seek expression, ways to begin to repay what can never be repaid! King David, at the heights of this feeling of overwhelming gratitude said, “MAH ASHIV HASHEM CALL TAGMELOHI ALAI” – “How can I repay HASHEM for all that HE has done for me!?” This can either be seen as a rhetorical question, as if saying, “It is impossible for me to repay” or it is a sincere question, in search of new and innovative ways to repay that endless debt.
It has been said and I believe it is true, that it is not that happy people are more grateful but rather that grateful people are happier. That puts the task of becoming happy in our hands. So how are we to awaken these feelings? It may not be as difficult as it seems. We don’t even have to trick ourselves into counting our blessings by responding to the challenge, “What if you woke up tomorrow with only those things you thanked HASHEM for today? What would you be doing all day today?” The truth is we woke up today! If we get a notebook and write on the top of the first page, “THANK YOU HASHEM for …” and then populate that page with things you are grateful for, big and small, and do it again and again, day after day, you will begin to discover how wealthy you really are. The Mishne in Avos asks, “Who is the rich person!? One who is rejoicing with what he has!” Filling that book up will not only remind us but it will increase our actual wealth. We will find more and more to be grateful for, because whatever we appreciate appreciates!
A few years back on Erev Rosh HaShana one of my sons called and told me that we should keep in mind that HASHEM has many wonderful things in store for us in the coming year. It’s not all about harsh decrees and judgments. I shared with him that on the way back from New York one day I had an hour-long conversation with a young man that had a boat load of real challenges. After listening and validating his pain I arrived back in Monsey. I told him we have to wind down now but I shared with him the following:
We are treated to an important mathematical equation in the introductory words of the Ten Commandments. HASHEM states that HE is visiting iniquity for 3 or 4 generations and rewarding 2000 generations. It seems there are not 2000 generations to speak of. History is not that long. Rashi helps by spelling out the “Holy Ratio” of HASHEM’s kindliness to strictness being 500 to 1. What are we to do with this formula? Of what practical import is it to us? Dare I ask?! I suggested that he should first write down and/or express 500 things to be grateful for and then register one complaint. “Then he should find 500 more things to celebrate and then register another complaint, and like that “you can complain all you want.”
My son said something that explained a common phrase that we all know. He said, “Abba, by the time he gets to the complaint, he’ll realize this is also good!” Then it struck me. That’s the meaning of GAM ZU L’TOVA – This is also for the good! What is the word “GAM” – also coming to include? This is not a statement to pull out of our pocket only at those hapless moments when the soup spills or we get a parking ticket. No! This is a window into the mindset of Nachum Ish Gam Zu! He was putting together a many million-piece puzzle, a paradigm of HASHEM’s endless kindness and blessings and when a puzzle piece came into his hands that did not fit into that model of goodliness, he recognized that he may not understand just now, but, somehow, “GAM ZU L’TOVA!” – “THIS IS ALSO GOOD!”